Where’s the remote control on life?

With a tug at my skirt, my hands carelessly fluttered to make sure each part of me was immaculate. I took into consideration that nothing could be out of place. Readjusting the hair behind my ear for the sixth time, I relaxed my shoulders. All the clenched muscles had gone back to their regular pose and my butterflies ceased their calamity.
With my head held down my eyes darted from; floors to chairs, my hands to my phone, and then to the various people around the room. The walls appeared to cave in and the tables too were closer now.
How had this began?
A desire embedded itself and began excavating the many cautionary parts of my heart. I had not wanted to plummet through the air as an asteroid determining that earth can be a new home. I had taken steps to be distant and close the door on my way out
It’s latch was suppose to catch the lock. Up and down the aisles, I fought with not only myself but the deceitfulness that had brought me here. The frigid waves rode up from the sea and carried me as lifeless as Ophelia. I came floating through the times of the past. Those who had pricked my fingers for a sign of sacrifice would be in for a rude awakening.
Time has ran circles around me. I was not suppose to bring up the scent of his cologne sauntering around me. No, his voice should be foreign now (pun intended). I had urged myself to completely submit to change and ride it’s coattails. With an adjustment of my sweatshirt, I took a deep sigh and
thought perhaps my past would never explain this madness.

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